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Agent X: Guess Who’s Back!

by Agent X

agent-x

Guess who’s back, back again. X is back, tell your friends. That song reference may have gone over some heads, but who cares, because due to high demand, I’M BACK! Dry those tears, because you’ll never be out of the real estate gossip loop again with me on the job.

You may be wondering where I’ve been, but if I reveal that information I would have to kill all of you, and that would take a lot of time and effort. I may or may not have helped a wealthy celebrity purchase an entire island, but that only took about a day or two. Use your imagination to fill in the rest of the blanks.

I suppose that’s enough about me, so let’s get to the reason that I’m the most beloved and reviled agent out there: the scoop.

Dennis Rodkin is retiring from the biz and moving to California to start a plant nursery with his brother. I suppose the “polar vortex” has had a different effect on all of us. I saw it as an excuse to buy an amazing jacket, while Dennis decided to flee the city. One might even say he’s returning to his roots.

@properties was looking for more apostrophes, so they added John D’Ambrogio to the roster. Rick Sobin and Cyndy Salgado also jumped on board, possibly because they’re both fond of the colors yellow and red. And in suburban news, Michael LaFido joined Jameson Sotheby’s International Realty, much to the chagrin of his former brokerage. Look, I get it, some people aren’t good with change.

On Sept. 10, I hopped into my finest duds and joined the gang at Chicago Association of Realtors’ 131st Annual Inaugural Gala. Wow, time sure flies! I remember the first one like it was just yesterday (you read that right). I do enjoy getting all gussied up and seeing the ladies in their finest. One word to describe the lighting concept: purple.

Congrats to Millie Rosenbloom on being inducted into the CAR Hall of Fame, and as per usual, she was wearing a killer dress. Which incidentally was also purple, or perhaps it was just the lighting. Note to organizers: Keep the photo booth open longer please. Most of the room was playing on their phones during the speeches anyway, so wouldn’t it be better if they were helping you get your money’s worth in the photo booth instead? You could’ve had a picture of me, but unfortunately it was never open when I walked by on the way to the bar. And if you think you spotted me sitting at the CA table you’re mistaken; this social butterfly never sits at events.

The Neighborhood Loans boat cruise was on Sept. 11, and due to the weather conditions I was unable to attend. Looking this great takes effort, and I don’t do rain or wind. I was able to follow the action via Instagram thanks to one agent who still managed to look exceptionally tan despite the lack of sunshine.

I popped into the CA offices this week (heavily disguised of course) where the editor blinded me with a letter she had received in the mail that someone had printed on hot pink paper. The letter was only signed as being from “anonymous agent,” who wasn’t creative enough to come up with an alias as clever as mine, and this person wants you all to know that listing agents in the Chicago area don’t need to show their properties because when they say no to a showing, they are saying no to a sale. Since it was on pink paper and signed in cursive it must be important, so do what you want with this nugget. 

What I’ve missed the most these past few years is watching all of my old real estate party buddies get older. Dan Gjeldum, Sam Powell, Sara Hulsebus and Reno Manuel all got jiggy with it on Sept. 12, while Paulette Rodriguez was left out and had to wait until the 13th to celebrate. I sent Michael Cozzi a box of beer koozies on Sept. 15 in honor of his big day, and Lory Wyatt got a VHS copy of Wyatt Earp on Sept. 16. CA’s very own Anne Hartnett whooped it up on Sept. 19, and Peter Raich will get down with the get down on Sept. 26.

If you have more dish that you’d like me to spill – or gossip that you don’t want anyone to know about – send me an email at agentx@agentpublishing.com and I’ll be sure to make it everyone’s business.

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